What the heck is Rome?
"Not what but where darling," Ismie says as we walk into the cells.
I just realized that the Narrator always titles these entries in my journal. This makes me nervous.
"It's called foreboding. He is planning evil things for your future." Ismie says as we look at the collective of my friends and their new collection of jail-friends.
"Hi," I say waving at Max and Jane. "Miss me?"
"Well, it's about bloody time!" Jane manages to yell before Max slaps his hand over her mouth then makes an awful face when she bites his finger.
"It's been a few weeks since you left," Max says through gritted teeth.
"It's not my fault," I reply, " It was the narrator who went off to do other things."
"Who?" Max asks.
"That is some bloody fine excuse girl!" Grimm snarls from his cage. "I am no animal girl!"
"Look, could we speed this up, perhaps?" Prince Charming asks from his cell.
"You!" A troll screams lunging for the bars.
"Me?" I squawk.
"Not you, twit. HER!" The Troll snarls.
I look at Ismie, she shrugs.
"Me," She says.
"I'm gonna kill you!" It snarls.
"I think not." Ismie who twitches her wand.
"What are you going to do?" the garden gnome snarls. "DAMN!"
"Do we need the keys?" I ask, Ismie hands them over. I start unlocking cells. Max embraces me as I open his and Jane's. We kiss.
and kiss.
"I think we get the point," Jane interrupts.
Max lets me go.
I hand him the keys and make some oblique hand gestures.
Jane embraces me. We kiss
and kiss.
"WE GET THE POINT!!!" Grimm yells.
Ismie embraces me.
"STOP!" EVERYONE yells.
Ismie gives me a peck on the cheek.
"There's always tomorrow," she says and turns Grimm into a garden gnome.
"What did you do that!" Grimm squeaks. "Hey, I don't squeak!"
"Just wondered if it would work," Ismie says. "Dwarves resist magic so you just never know."
"Gnome's are basically Dwarves." Another garden gnome says.... it's the annoying one- can't remember his name.
"Hey! My name is Sproggut-"
Right the annoying one.
"Hey! I wasn't finished, My name is-"
"Well, it is about time! Did you get my treasure?"
It's Prince Charming.
"Technically no," I answer.
"Technically, you were supposed to slay the dragon." He says trying to look casual and authoritarian at the same time.
"Technicalities," I say thinking that he'll never pull off anything but confused.
"I can see why you are still single," he fires back.
"I can see why you are still a virgin!" I fire back.
"I am not a virgin." He says weakl-
"Stop doing that!"
Stop doing what?
"Making me look bad by assigning passive descriptions to how I talk."
Oh.
"Yes, oh," He says triumphantly.
"Don't stop," Max says. "This is good stuff."
Everyone is watching us argue.
"Oh grow up!" Prince IgotanegothesizeofCharon yells.
"I DO NOT!" He yells.
"Charon is pretty big," His Man-at-Arms remarks.
"Who's side are you on!" Prince Touchypants accuses.
"Oh, that's mature." Duke Ivan says from the doorway.
"You are such a virgin," I reply.
"That's the last straw, I will smite you even if you are a girl, Girlie!"
I punch him. He goes down like a pageboy at his first knife fight.
"I suppose, I will have to protest about that." The Man-at-Arms says.
We look down at Mister Glassjaw together.
"Nah." I say.
Ismie joins us.
"Nice punch."
"I need a Drink." Grimm says.
"You're going alone, if you think we are going back to the Parasite Inn."
"Not what but where darling," Ismie says as we walk into the cells.
I just realized that the Narrator always titles these entries in my journal. This makes me nervous.
"It's called foreboding. He is planning evil things for your future." Ismie says as we look at the collective of my friends and their new collection of jail-friends.
"Hi," I say waving at Max and Jane. "Miss me?"
"Well, it's about bloody time!" Jane manages to yell before Max slaps his hand over her mouth then makes an awful face when she bites his finger.
"It's been a few weeks since you left," Max says through gritted teeth.
"It's not my fault," I reply, " It was the narrator who went off to do other things."
"Who?" Max asks.
"That is some bloody fine excuse girl!" Grimm snarls from his cage. "I am no animal girl!"
"Look, could we speed this up, perhaps?" Prince Charming asks from his cell.
"You!" A troll screams lunging for the bars.
"Me?" I squawk.
"Not you, twit. HER!" The Troll snarls.
I look at Ismie, she shrugs.
"Me," She says.
"I'm gonna kill you!" It snarls.
"I think not." Ismie who twitches her wand.
"What are you going to do?" the garden gnome snarls. "DAMN!"
"Do we need the keys?" I ask, Ismie hands them over. I start unlocking cells. Max embraces me as I open his and Jane's. We kiss.
and kiss.
"I think we get the point," Jane interrupts.
Max lets me go.
I hand him the keys and make some oblique hand gestures.
Jane embraces me. We kiss
and kiss.
"WE GET THE POINT!!!" Grimm yells.
Ismie embraces me.
"STOP!" EVERYONE yells.
Ismie gives me a peck on the cheek.
"There's always tomorrow," she says and turns Grimm into a garden gnome.
"What did you do that!" Grimm squeaks. "Hey, I don't squeak!"
"Just wondered if it would work," Ismie says. "Dwarves resist magic so you just never know."
"Gnome's are basically Dwarves." Another garden gnome says.... it's the annoying one- can't remember his name.
"Hey! My name is Sproggut-"
Right the annoying one.
"Hey! I wasn't finished, My name is-"
"Well, it is about time! Did you get my treasure?"
It's Prince Charming.
"Technically no," I answer.
"Technically, you were supposed to slay the dragon." He says trying to look casual and authoritarian at the same time.
"Technicalities," I say thinking that he'll never pull off anything but confused.
"I can see why you are still single," he fires back.
"I can see why you are still a virgin!" I fire back.
"I am not a virgin." He says weakl-
"Stop doing that!"
Stop doing what?
"Making me look bad by assigning passive descriptions to how I talk."
Oh.
"Yes, oh," He says triumphantly.
"Don't stop," Max says. "This is good stuff."
Everyone is watching us argue.
"Oh grow up!" Prince IgotanegothesizeofCharon yells.
"I DO NOT!" He yells.
"Charon is pretty big," His Man-at-Arms remarks.
"Who's side are you on!" Prince Touchypants accuses.
"Oh, that's mature." Duke Ivan says from the doorway.
"You are such a virgin," I reply.
"That's the last straw, I will smite you even if you are a girl, Girlie!"
I punch him. He goes down like a pageboy at his first knife fight.
"I suppose, I will have to protest about that." The Man-at-Arms says.
We look down at Mister Glassjaw together.
"Nah." I say.
Ismie joins us.
"Nice punch."
"I need a Drink." Grimm says.
"You're going alone, if you think we are going back to the Parasite Inn."
